Prayer request for my dying Regina

richkolasa · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 1:27 pm

Hi everyone,

Some of you know me personally, and may be familiar with the horror in my life. After 20 years of searching, I met the most amazing woman, Regina Murray, almost two years ago. Even though she had metastatic breast cancer, she was doing great, and we were to be engaged in Ireland in April. We were in California twice during 2007 and all of her signs were that she was heading towards remission.

Unfortunately, she has a crap family, and her loser-ass 48-year old brother not only didn't stay away from her (she had to move home when put on disability), but he would stay at her mom's house when he was sick, and use her computer, camera, everything.

She got sick around Christmas from him, and subsequently almost died after surgery to remove a litre of fluid from her pericardial sack. After 2 months rehab, she was going well until she had to have a surgery to remove a lesion from behind her ear.

She got weak, after the surgery which allowed cancer to spread in her hip, confining her to a bed. Her family (I have no legal say) refused hip-replacement surgery, saying "they didn't want to put her through that", so now she's home dying in pain in a bed with hospice care. To make matters worse, the family is not allowing many visitors, and they have made me less than welcome saying that "I'm just a friend". We were inseperable since our first date on Sept 22, 2006. Her mother does have mental issues, and brother and sister are "stepford-like" in their devotion to "mom", so there is so reasonable avenue for me to spend time with her during this time.

It's amazingly hard for me to deal with this. I may try to get a lawyer involved because she is conscious and coherant, and a legal resident of the house, but as of now, I won't be able to see her over the Fourth of July weekend. If you see me at Geneseo either of the next two weekends, please understand that I'm having a darn tough time with this frustration and anger.

Please say a prayer for Regina if you are so inclined. She is the most special person I've ever known, and though she has almost no chance of surviving, I'm not giving up on her as she was much stronger last night than the last time I saw her (5 days before).

Thank you,
Rich

Jesse C. · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 5:04 pm

You got 'em, Rich

Django · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 5:43 pm

Wow that is rough. Prayers...

LadyO2Pilot · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 7:07 pm

My heart goes out to you, Rich and my prayers for Regina.

Nathan · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 7:29 pm

my sister died from cancer...this brings all too many nightmares. Prayers for you and yours. Never quit keep fighting man..

michaelharadon · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:12 pm

Prayers sent, Rich.

All my very best to you and Regina, along with the hope that love and compassion enter into the hearts of her family.

Michael

rwdfresno · **Posted:** Wed Jul 02, 2008 10:13 pm

Rich,

That sounds like an incredibly difficult situation. I will be praying.

Ryan

mustangdriver · **Posted:** Thu Jul 03, 2008 10:32 am

That is a rough time man, I am thinking of you.

b29flteng · **Posted:** Fri Jul 04, 2008 11:54 pm

Will do....

Jack Cook · **Posted:** Sun Jul 06, 2008 4:44 pm

Done

Second Air Force · **Posted:** Sun Jul 06, 2008 6:46 pm

We send our prayers.

Scott and Ellen

spookythecat · **Posted:** Mon Jul 07, 2008 12:53 am

You're in my thoughts.

lestweforget · **Posted:** Mon Jul 07, 2008 1:19 pm

You and your loved ones are in my thoughts. Love and hope to you.

richkolasa · **Posted:** Tue Jul 08, 2008 9:18 am

Thank you all. I had a nice hour and a half with her last night, and had 4 opportunities to say goodbye, going back 2 weeks when she was still in the hospital. She left this crap life in her sleep last night, knowing how much she was loved. You can't imagine how special she was, funny, fun, smart, caring, open-minded (I could have taken her to a convention of wheel-bearing grease manufacturers and she would have gone and had a wonderful time), interesting, interested, adorable, pretty, full of life and so full of love (animals, birds, flowers, traveling, cuddling, drawing, taking pictures, broadway plays, friends, family....).

I'm just sorry that some of you that I know didn't get to meet her. It's beyond belief that it's been more than a year and three quarters since we had our first date. Her medications always kept her from doing things to the extent she wanted, but we did a lot. She was the most thoughful person in the world.

This was just 5 weeks ago, and I was amazed at how strong she'd gotten after nearly dying at the end of February.

RyanShort1 · **Posted:** Tue Jul 08, 2008 9:39 am

We're all sorry to hear of your loss. Will pray for you now...

Ryan

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